Adventures in Publishing

I had just completed the manuscript of my first book Nude Nuns and Other Peculiar People and started exploring publishing options.  Since I live in the Kansas City area and since my book fit in the "general humor" category, I thought I would try first with a KC based publishing house specializing in same.  I went on line to read their book submissions requirements and prepared a package of materials in compliance with their guidelines.  I called for an appointment but never received a call back.

Undeterred, I put on my Sunday best clothes and went to their downtown offices with my mini-book and the other items required.  I approached the attractive, well coiffed receptionist and asked if I could speak to someone in the book submissions departments.

She said, "Do you have an appointment?"

"No." I replied.

"Well, they don't speak to people without an appointment."

"Could I make an appointment?"

"No. They don't make appointments with people like you."

Quickly grasping the Kafkaesque moment, I replied, "I guess I'm screwed."

"Yes, you are."  She observed.

She later relented and gave me a phone number to call.  Upon getting the chance to speak to a person in book submissions, I was told, "We get 10-15 unsolicited submissions a day.  You can leave your materials if you want, but we can give you no assurance of when we might look at it.  I went back to their offices and left my materials.  Within a few day I received a written rejection letter that said in part,  "...If you are serious about getting your book published you need a literary agent."

And thus ended my journey into the world of big time publishing and began one into the netherworld of self-publishing.