Banjo destiny

NNAOPP Update

January 2013

I regret having to report that I've once again delayed my yacht order, as Christmas sales of NNAOPP were insufficient to warrant proceeding with this ostentatious aspiration.  However, the New Year has offered a glimmer of hope for untold riches, but from a new and unexpected direction.

This past weekend we arrived in Sanibel, FL.  We were going to meet friends in Naples for dinner, so Judy planned to stop at a Wal-Mart Super Center to provision.  Her instructions were precise and brusque, "I need an hour, don't bother me."  So I decided to take my banjo along for a little practice session.  I found an isolated spot in the huge parking lot, pulled my treasured Ome open back out of the car, and contentedly plucked away.  Amazingly, I collected $2.25 from passersby who threw dollar bills and coins into my case.  The first coin tosser caught me by surprise, but I thanked him. Once the case was salted, others seemed to just follow suit. Next time I won't shave and will skip the Naples dining attire and go with more of a Bo Jangles look, adding even more luster to my nascent career in the arts.

Mardi Gras is coming soon, so I'm now faced with a conundrum:  Dare I dress in bedraggled garb, sit on a pickle barrel, and pluck like there is no tomorrow in the hope of earning funds sufficient for one Hurricane?  Or should I stand on our balcony at Royal and St. Peter, drink a cold bottle of Abita, and shower future Miss Alabamas with beads?  Hmmm?

I'm still waiting anxiously from word from the NYC book agent.  The good news is that I didn't immediately receive a rejection letter.  Sales of NNAOPP are now at 1,190. If you encounter a wizened man playing banjo on a nearby street corner, throw him a few coins.

May nothing but good tidings come your way in 2013.

Warmest regards,

Chuck

Merry Christmas

NNAOPP Christmas 2012

Merry Christmas To All,

Before this picture was taken, Granddaughter Waverly told her Mom, "I will go, but I won't sit on his lap, and I don't want him to hug me."  Finn was perplexed, but went along with the Norman Rockwell drill that American parents have imposed upon their children for generations.  Charlie, however, chose to articulate his feelings with bold action.

Waverly, 3, Finn, 2, (red shirt) and Charlie, 2, (green pants) Coulson.

We're fortunate to live about one mile from Lucy, Fred, and their little ones and to be able to be a part of their lives.  After being thanked by Fred for a recent babysitting tour of duty, I replied, "No need to thank us.  Your kids are the most interesting people I know.  It's a great pleasure to spend time with them.  I'd do this even if you didn't ply us with wine."

After our Milford Track - NNAOPP update one reader responded with the admonition, "You are beyond shameless.  My Amway neighbors are rank amateurs in contrast!"  Another thoughtful reader noted, "If you have any self-respect, any at all, even just a smidgen, you must lose that gay knit cap covering your head in those photos.  Surely a more comely covering can be found."  Thanks to all who take the time to read my endless stream of drivel and respond in kind.

A new friend with a background in publishing told me, "Selling 1,185 books out of the 'trunk of your car' is fairly impressive, but you need a publisher if you want your book to reach a wider audience.  But it's also true that you need an agent in order to have any chance at finding a real publisher."  He gave me the names of two literary agents that I will be contacting.   I'll keep you posted as the saga continues.

I hope the year has been good to everyone and that the joy of the Christmas season finds a home in your heart.  Like most everyone with a few years under our belts, we've experienced the loss of loved ones, and many of those near and dear are afflicted with serious and limiting health issues.  My heart aches for those who are suffering and in need.  My Christmas wish for all is that you find the strength to manage life's burdens and savor the many wonders that surround us. May the New Year bring good health and a good cheer.

Merry Christmas to all my Christian friends.  Happy Hanukah to my Jewish friends.   And to my agnostic and atheist friends, I hope you enjoy the non-sectarian-winter-holiday-featuring-excessive-gift-exchanges.

Chuck

World Tour a Success

The NNAOPP world tour started with a speech in my hometown, Bowling Green, MO to the Pike County Hospital Foundation.  It was attended by about 250 folks and I sold 36 books afterwards.  Thanks to the fine folks from Pike County.  From there Ben and I traveled half way around the world to New Zealand to hike the Milford Track and the Tongariro Crossing (check out the story and photos on a related page).  We had a great time, but most importantly, I launched the international campaign with sales of 5 copies of NNAOPP.   Thanks again to all who've helped in this journey.  Remember NNAOPP when contemplating your Christmas lists.

NNAOPP Road Show Off to New Zealand

Ben and I are off to New Zealand this weekend to hike the Milford Track.  Hopefully the adventure will provide some fresh material for stories.  Also intend to spread the word down under about the curative effects of reading NNAOPP.

Second Printing

I'm happy to report that there will be a second printing of NNAOPP.  Thanks to many of you've who've shared kind comments about the book.  The second edition will carry the following excerpts from your comments on the new/revised back cover of the book:

What Readers Are Saying About NNAOPP:

NNAOPP reminded me of Confederacy of Dunces.  Perhaps it was your turn of phrase, or perhaps just the amount of laughter while reading it.  Bless you for writing this book!  We all need the laughter in our lives!

Recently I have had several nights where I wake up at 2:30 unable to go back to sleep. I turned on the light and read chapters from your book (I keep it on my night stand) and have laughed out loud so much I scared my cat. 

There are not many books I have read in my life that have triggered spontaneous out loud laughter.  NNAOPP did. 

Your book arrived in my mailbox yesterday.  At 2 a.m. I became ill (24 hour bug?).  I began reading nude nuns today and have experienced a full recovery.  I attribute this speedy recovery to the frequent bursts of laughing out loud!

My continuous chuckles and outright laughter while reading NNAOPP in an airport caused a number of people to give me worried looks. The zany stories and characters described are certifiably true for anyone who grew up in the 1950s and attended college in the 1960s. This book is a great story of Midwestern Americana and a hilarious view on life that is rare and perhaps nearing extinction.

I just received this 'book review' from my 91-year old lesbian aunt.   She is a voracious reader, so I bought and sent her a copy when I purchased mine.  This is what she said, "I always meant to tell you that Nude Nuns & Other Peculiar People was one of the best funny books I've read in years. Loved the Nude Nuns story."

There is a line in Forrest Gump with Forrest sitting on the bench, and he had just finished telling the old lady on the park bench his life story.  The lady on the bench says, with a clear demeanor of mild disbelief, "What a beautiful story.  And you tell it so well." Your book is a great story, and you tell it very well.

Calling attention to new pages posted

Two recent stories have been added to my pages:  Climbing Red Cloud (Colorado 14er), and Moab Mountain Biking.  Take a gander if you've an interest.

New reviews on www.goodread.com

Thanks to three kind readers of Nude Nuns and Other Peculiar People for posting favorable reviews and recommendations on www.goodreads.com, a website to share ideas on good books.